Labels are just another form of body shaming
you’re more than just a number
The world we live in isn’t always sunshine and daisies, or how ever that phrase goes. Shit is pretty damn hard if I am being honest. Some of us spend hours at a time nit-picking, pocking, and prodding at our self image. While others go about their business. If you’re the later, please teach me your ways because most of the time you’re girl is on the struggle bus! Body shaming has been around for as long as I can remember. I wasn’t one of the cool kids in school, I wasn’t labeled the most beautiful in my family. I wasn’t, I wasn’t, I wasn’t…. and the list goes on.
Shaming your own body isn’t your little itty bitty secret you hold in your pocket anymore. It’s appearance has made itself known more and more over the years since content creators and social media platforms have sky rocketed with popularity.
can you relate?
Be honest with yourself, have you went on a reel scrolling spree and stopped at a video and thought “I wished I looked like them.” or ” I bet if I do this, this, and that I’ll be some what perfect just like them”?
Now before I go all mama bear on you, it’s my duty to point out that you are not alone and this mindset isn’t your fault.
The world we live in has drilled these unrealistic expectations on us. We feel like if we just push a little bit harder, bully ourselves a little bit louder, we will some how find our happiness.
In all honesty, it’s fricken exhausting. Waking up every morning feeling like today is going to be a bright shiny day and nothing will tear you down. Only to see someone on the internet or in real life being the person your imagination believes you should be. Or have someone come in and rain on your parade with their hurtful, not so sneaky words.
Body Shaming can lead to out of norm behavoirs
So, what do we do? We start to form an unhealthy fixation with how we look. Some become addicted to going to the gym multiple times a day, while others become obsessed with counting carbs/ calories and scooping their food portions into measured out cups.
My choices growing up led me to an eating disorder, something I never wish on anyone. But it also led me to the person I am today. I know from experience that making changes to your self image because someone told you too or to look like some else, does not and will not bring on a happy ending.
we make labels universal
In the boudoir world I am finding myself wanting to use words like plus size because hey, everyone is using it right? I built my business with the end goal of NOT being like every one else because that is what I want my clients to do. I want them to be comfortable with sticking out like a sore thumb. Embracing the person they will always and have always been. So when I find myself wanting to follow along, even if it’s just phrases, it gives me the heebi-jeebies.
I want my clients coming to their sessions fully prepared to embrace their sexuality and individuality. I don’t want them coming to their session with labels or phrases that could be twisted in a negative way.
Every client that comes to the studio is curvy, toned, beautiful and uniquely themselves. Calling one person plus sized, or skinny and another something different just doesn’t set right with my beliefs.
Kick body shaming to the curb
Normally this would be the point where I would tell you to cut your shit out and deliver a sales pitch to book a boudoir session. But, GOTCHYA! Having your own boudoir experience isn’t going to magically poof you back to a “loving yourself” vibe. Instead, your first steps should be working on yourself, how you see yourself, and you got it, loving yourself! If you go to your boudoir photoshoot full on body shaming your appearance, even seeing amazing images of yourself may not help. I want you coming to your session fully prepared that the images you receive will be the same person you see in the mirror, not some imagination of someone you could be. Instead, think about taking steps that will lead you up to booking your boudoir photoshoot.
let’s get down to business
- START YOUR DAY OFF RIGHT- Remember your mental health is a priority. Start your day off my looking in the mirror and finding 1 thing you love about yourself. Then walk away (ekk might be hard at first, but you got this). Each day find something new and keep adding to the list.
- BODY NEUTRALITY- If you are not quite to the point of “oh yea baby this body of mine is hot stuff” what you can due is stick yourself right in the middle. Instead of telling yourself all the things you don’t like about your body, list all the things it can do “My legs give me the ability to walk” kind of thing.
- EMBRACE WHO YOU ARE WITH NO APOLOGIES- Listen sweet cheeks. I get it, you’ve most likely spent a lot of time telling yourself you wish you looked different, but I am here to tell you that your value as a human being is much more than your appearance. Think of all the positive qualities you DO have that don’t revolve around your appearance.
YOU’RE WORTH IT
I know it can be hard to change how we look at ourselves, some day’s I struggle too. It’s part of the reason why I created my VIP FACEBOOK group. Where like minded women can come together, get support, and learn more about boudoir. Just do me a favor a never forget who you truly are and give the bird to those that don’t embrace it.
BEFORE YOU GO STALK ME ON THE GRAM:
